Why Journal?

Journaling and writing

I spent quite a bit of time in America in the late 80s and in that time I was fortunate enough to take a seminar on journaling.  It was a life-affirming seminar that has stayed with me all my adult life.  Back then journaling was evident in the UK but in the USA it was gathering its own very clear momentum.  Now, of course, it is a global occupation for a core group of creative and dedicated beings.  I am not sure where I would be without my journals and I have come to realise that I take them for granted.  Pondering on their value has led me to record their special qualities and search out how others see journaling.

Journaling is, by definition, a record.  Your journal is a space where you can record whatever you like.  At its best it has no boundaries and no agenda.  It is a space where both conscious and subconscious thoughts can be left to play quite happily together and you will be content to leave them there.  There are many reasons to journal and we all know why we do it, but sometimes we forget.  I had forgotten that my initial reason to journal was to record my experiences as my professional dance career found its feet.  I had forgotten because when I look back at those early journals I see so much more than dancing.  I see a young dancer trying desperately to find her creative voice in a fiercely competitive world.  I see a frightened young dancer living in a strange country but making the best of friends.  I see a dancer that emerges into a young woman through a defining role as Eurydice and I see so much more.

This has taught me that we do not, in fact, always know why we are journaling but the joy in looking back on old journals is one of life’s most rewarding personal experiences.  I have always viewed journaling as a highly creative medium of expression.  You give yourself permission to be free in your journal and you are also free from judgement.  Many of us keep our journals private, but increasingly there is a culture of sharing.  I think perhaps a combination of both approaches is the one I favour.  There are parts of my journals that I keep private and sacred but there are other parts that need to be lifted off the page and shared.  An example of that would be a piece of choreography that demands an audience.

For me, it is important that my journal is not just about words.  Many of us view the world in pictures and pictures take front of stage in our minds as we try and make sense of our world.  Therefore pictures deserve a place in our journals.  Creating pictures can take many different forms and sometimes the joy is in the identification of the medium.  Some days I am drawn to watercolours while others it is charcoal and so the decisions take shape.  Sometimes my pictures are no more than doodles but I have come to realise how important these simple pictures are to my journaling process.  I have often found a new and inspiring idea locked away in a doodle and the joy is in finding it.  It is almost as if my conscious mind plays hide and seek with my subconscious mind.

There are black days though.  On black days I sit and stare at an empty page.  I desperately want to journal that day but for some reason or another there is nothing.  I have no starting point and I have no motivation.  Over the years journaling has become part of my spiritual life and I often feel a strong urge to journal.  But on black days there is nothing.  In those dark moments I turn to others for help.  There are many excellent web sites dedicated to journaling and I have left you with some useful links at the end of this piece.  I particularly like the ‘tips for journaling’ pages as they offer up starting points and usually that it all you need to break through the blackness and find the colour once more.

I have just a few tips of my own that I have found useful over the years –

·         See your entire page as an expression for your entry.  Take time to create a background for your words and note the association between the two aspects of the page

·         Never be frightened of a blank page – it is your gift to yourself

·         Keep writing or drawing and don’t stop until you know you are done and you will know. 

·         Date your entries as this will be important when you look back.

·         Don’t avoid difficult subjects as sometimes they offer up the greatest learning

·         Only ever share your journal on your terms

·         Avoid erasing you will probably regret it

 

For me, as a writer, my journals are often my starting point.  They offer up suggestions and they don’t mind if I move away in new directions.  My journals are my constant companion and I usually have more than one on the go at the same time.  I am not sure I have ever truly experienced writer’s block as my journals have saved me from that fate.  There is always something there; you just have to look long enough.  Everything goes in my journal and it often appears to make no sense on first reading.  I am always fascinated by the connections between different entries.  For me this is where the subconscious finds its true voice.  It has already made the connections and it is just waiting for the conscious mind to catch up!  I view my journal as my writing fodder as it feeds me all the time.  I have a small notebook that I carry around with me all the time that feeds my journal.  My journals are too precious to throw in a bag as I dash out the door so I use a small notebook for that task.  In my notebook I record what I see, hear, taste, smell and feel.  I record anything that interests me and then, when I have more time, I transfer these points of interest to my journal.  This is a joyful stage where, sometimes in the transference, mutation occurs.  What eventually ends up in my journal has changed and grown wings and I love that.  And so the creative process begins and I am grateful that it has never ended.  Journaling is my creative life blood and if I could take them with me after I die I would. 

If you have never tried journaling give it a go. Visit some of the web sites suggested here to help you get started.  For me, one of the best bits of the entire process is choosing the journal that you are going to use.  The world is awash with wonderful notebooks and it is your job to find the one for you.  You will absolutely know when you have found it though! I hope that journaling brings you joy, peace and much creativity. 

Scent walk

I am currently studying on a course which aims to establish a deeper connection with flowers.  One of the tasks was to go on a 'scent walk' before writing about the experience.  I thought I might share...

My favourite time to do a scent walk is just after the rain has stopped.  Everything seems more vivid then.  This afternoon the sun came out as the rain departed and off I went hunting for scents.  Just stepping out of my back door I am immediately hit by the chives insisting that they are smelt first.  Much more subtle oregano tries to get a look in but with only a gentle success.  Taking footsteps alongside my cut flower border and this is a myriad of scents but winning through are the Stocks.  They are strong and bold and very much of the moment.  I notice that the borage in the next row has bowed its head in reverence and so it should. 

Moving away from the cut flower border it is the hawthorn blossom with its musty drift that captures my attention as it arches it branches across my path.  The ever present ferns lap at the branches and release some more subtle but earthy fragrance.  Into the wooded area and the very last of the English Bluebells tickle my nose to remind me that they were once so powerful a matter of weeks ago.  I feel a sense of sadness as it is one of my favourite scents and I will have to wait another year to be captivated by them once more. 

The hedgerow is full of honey bees and I smell the white clover before I see it.  A foxglove dangles her slight fragrance above the clover as if keeping watch.  Moving into the field the wet grass fragrance dominates and I have to stand still for sometime to smell anything else.  From the edges I detect a delicate fragrance and it takes me a moment to figure out what it is.  Deep in the thick grass is a Dog Rose just coming into flower.  If I wasn’t concentrating on scents I would have trampled right passed it.  Lifting and separating the grass I give the rose some more space so that its delicate fragrance can start to shine more brightly. 

Re-tracing my steps I return to the house just diverting slightly to take in the scent from the poly tunnel.  In here sweet pea completely dominates although you can pick up ripe strawberry as well.  Meaning delicate pleasures sweet peas offers up my favourite scent of all.  How can something so delicate release such a potent floral scent?  As they flicker in the gentle breeze the scent moves among the other plants in the tunnel just pausing once near a forgotten lavender that punches the air with its unmistakable scent. 

The rain has brought everything to life and the scents are no exception.  As I close the door on the chives I nod at the oregano to thank it for trying so very hard to be noticed.